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Recently, we reposted a Fast Company article with the title “Hollywood divided on whether Felicity Huffman and Lori Loughlin will ever work again”.

We asked the question, “How does doing something wrong turn into being ostracized and never working again?”

A LOT of topics came out of this one post but there is one that is most disconcerting:

What mattered in our original post was the question that was asked, “Should they be ostracized for what they did?” Rather than have a discussion about that topic, commenters made it about class inequity, politics, and ideology. People dropped insults about liberals and conservatives. The conversation was more about attacking than understanding.

Do those topics matter? Absolutely. How we approach them matters more.

We conflate arguments, live outraged, and attack anyone that has an opposing view. A lot of time, attention, and energy is spent on things we cannot control. By improperly investing those valuable resources, we miss a key point… that we need to take control of our own lives in the smallest ways possible.

Some people asked “what does this have to do with Define My Day?”

Everything! I ask you, how is this story defining your day?! How are the daily news headlines defining your day?

Our intent was to challenge the sense that ostracizing someone for doing something wrong is OK. People make mistakes, big and small. All of us operate in a gray area and none of us are all good or all bad.

Some people even vowed to never follow our page again… black and white thinking. No space for understanding. Point proven at the most simple level.

What impact does the college admissions story have on most people? I would argue: NONE.

We cannot be so distracted and enraged by the actions of a small group of people that it takes our attention away from what really matters.

And what happens? We bicker amongst ourselves while taking no real action.

Our lives won’t change based on what happens to anyone involved in this story. We still have the same daily responsibilities that we did the day before the story broke. We will still have them tomorrow.

What are you doing about it?

We need to spend more time worrying about the things happening closest to us. That’s how that post is most related to Define My Day.

It’s not “Let Someone Else Define My Day” or “I’ll Wait for Equality to Define My Day”. It’s Define My Day… now… for myself.

It’s about taking responsibility for our own lives by defining it for ourselves. We cannot be sidetracked by the hobgoblin of distraction that sensational stories like this really are.

How can we put ourselves in the best position to be our happiest selves?

I want the best for you all. I don’t give a crap if you’re on the left or right, rich or poor, or what race or religion you are. We all deserve to live happy and fulfilled. In order for that to happen, we have to take responsibility for our own happiness.

A key part of that is focusing on what really matters.